I apologize for my absence. I've been very busy lately. My life has been so crazy lately.
I found a new place to live with some pretty rad people, but I just found out last night that I can only stay there until December. I don't know how I'm going to afford a place on my own after that, but we'll see what life brings me.
As some of you know, I started dating a guy named Dick. Things were pretty intense and amazing at the beginning, but I feel like things are fizzling. In the past 2 weeks or so I've seen him only twice, and I'm kind of okay with that.
This past week I've been falling in love with a new boy. His name is Jay, and he makes me feel like no one else has before. It was so unexpected and it happened so fast, but it's kind of amazing. We had a perfect date on Tuesday night. We packed a picnic and went to Flagstaff Hill in Schenley Park, overlooking the city. We colored and talked and got to know each other a little more, and had the most perfect kiss I've ever had. We stayed until the sun went down, just lying there talking and laughing and enjoying each other's company.
With Dick, I feel like we only ever really skim the surface with things. We have so much in common, and we have a good time, and amazing chemistry, but I feel like there's no deep substance. We've never had a deep discussion about anything. I don't know much about him as a person the more I think about it. I know his likes and his dislikes, and that's about it. It also seems like it's more about what he wants to do. He would never just sit in the park with me and color, or just go on a walk.
The thing I love about Jay is that he is always up for the same things I want. If i want to buy crayons and a coloring book he'll do it with me emphatically. We also know so much about each other. I've shared my deepest secrets with him and vice versa. I've had the best week of my life spent with him.
If it were a perfect world, I'd be dating him. But he has a "girlfriend" and I have a "boyfriend." It makes things a little awkward. The funny thing is all four of us hung out tonight. It was so hard for Jay and I not to show affection toward each other.
So yeah. My life is confused, but I'm also the happiest I've ever been.